the worst lies are the lies we tell ourselves

sig sheet

i spent most of today sleeping. though i guess that was to be expected, considering the fact that until this morning, i had only three hours of sleep in the past two days. i pulled what was practically an all-nighter(i got only an hour's worth of sleep) last thursday in order to finish my sig sheet in time for the end of CIA week. i'd say it was worth it, though. i really, really like MBBS. i wouldn't want to have to wait until next year to become a member.

blast from the past

congrats to leslie for organizing a successful science camp! it was pretty fun. i wasn't involved at all in planning it, but being behind the scenes of an event is always interesting. especially since there were six facilitators from M16. block bonding!

the camp made me kinda nostalgic though. the energizer nick picked was the pony song. (i wonder how he knew it- i thought it was a CISV thing). it brought back a flood of memories from CISV and grade 6. and the main activity was an amazing race stations type thing, which made me remember all the cluster nights i went to(three of which i facilitated!) back in high school.

and during breakfast, ryan made me and nick sing the xavier school song. every couple of lines, he'd have us switch to another language. it was pretty funny. i was amazed that after all these years, i still knew all three(!!!) versions by heart.

as a kid all i ever wanted was to fastforward and grow up already. people would always tell me that i shouldn't hurry through life and that i should enjoy it while it's still simple. i never listened, though. it sucks to admit it, but they were right. i actually do kinda miss my childhood. never thought i would say that.

it hurts to think i'm not good enough

barely two months have passed and yet i've already completely regressed into my old patapon self. for the first couple of weeks i'd make sure to take notes during class, i'd make sure to pack my things before going to bed and i'd even study in advance. but lately i've been sleeping late, procrastinating...basically, displaying a poor work ethic. i lost my focus.

supposedly, as an original qualifer for MBB i should be one of the best students, but in reality i am (without a doubt) the worst. i'm intimidated by how driven and motivated everybody else is.

i wish some of it would rub off on me.

resurrection

new blog! i decided to use the same url(though with blogspot instead of livejournal) as my very first blog, the one i made back in 2007. doesn't exactly go with the fresh start motif, but whatever. remembering where you came from is just as important as living in the moment.

nowadays it usually takes me about half an hour to fall asleep, which is a big improvement over the two+ hours it would take me back in the summer. but since i have daily 7am classes, i want to cut that down even further. emptying my thoughts here before going to bed should help me get to sleep faster. also, i'm sure that my future self would really appreciate a record of my first year in UP.

i'll write a proper first entry by tomorrow. good night!